Saturday, February 02, 2008

The Good Men and the Bad Men


Sometimes when you are too engrossed in your own thoughts you need an outside opinion to make you change your thoughts ..this happened to me a few days ago when a male friend of mine helped me realize that I have been walking around with blinkers.

A guy's advice :


  • Not all men are bad

  • Never to find excuses for a man's mistake

  • No need to tolerate the bad behaviour.

12 comments:

MusicLover said...

Not all men are bad

Never to find excuses for a man's mistake

No need to tolerate the bad behaviour



Thats true but many Libyan women marry for the wrong reasons, but have to admit that their choices of men "Good Men" are limited.

A failure in a relationship does not mean we are not able to find the right person in future. Thank god I have a positive attitude to life.

youtube.com/watch?v=pmQVWH9u8Xo

youtube.com/watch?v=llB0UJlYWPU

a_akak said...

We are just misunderstood "thats all"

I agree with M.L. that unfortunatly Libyan girls are marrying for the wrong reasons and now people ask "How much $$$$$$ does he have" even if it is stolen and they dont ask if he is a good person or not

I also agree that sometimes it takes other people to make us see what we couldnt see on our own

Fe Aman allah

Libyan Violet said...

Music Lover I won't be so cynical as to say that the choices in the Libyan 'good men' pool are that limited but let's just say my condidence in finding that 'gem' Libyan guy is eroding fast :P

A-Akak I agree with both you and ML that Libyan girls are marrying for all the wrong reasons but you know what? those are the only women who can 'lead' and 'tame' the Libyan men. Unless it's a Western woman who will show them nujum il duhur fil gayla and they will not be even able to peep.

Basically both deserve each other. So rabi yihanihum bi ba3d. I still have not written them off because I have hope in a few good ones left :P
wala shino rayek ?

AmericanLibyan said...

We need this remainder constantly. I beleive it is easy for women to forget that not all men are bad. Too many bad experiences and we throw them all to the dogs. We forget that we made them this way. How? by finding excuses for their bad behavior and tolerating it. Women. Sometimes I wonder why men get all the bad rap.

AmericanLibyan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
AmericanLibyan said...

Oh and by the way Libyan Violet could you elaborate on this

"Libyan girls are marrying for all the wrong reasons but you know what? those are the only women who can 'lead' and 'tame' the Libyan men. Unless it's a Western woman who will show them nujum il duhur fil gayla and they will not be even able to peep."

I was not able to fully understand this and it sounds interesting especially since I am a western woman who might marry a non western Libyan man ;)

Libyan Violet said...

Americanlibyan, it's good to see you back. Actually you are not a Western woman you are an Arab (Libyan) woman if I'm correct so you don't qualify according to my theory. Ya3ni even if you were born in America you still share the same paradigm as your Libyan sisters born and raised in Libya. Not sure if that makes sense. But basically my observations is that if the wife is of non-Arabo/Libyan descent then the Libyan husband living in Libya will let her get away with some things that a Libyan woman counterpart would not have been tolerated to do.

AmericanLibyan said...

I see. Thanks for clarifying but I do not believe that a non-Arab could get away with more. Could you maybe give me examples?

I do believe though that they may get away with different things than we do but at the end of the day the feeling is all the same. I know Americans who marry Libyans and they complain about the same things we do. Non-Arabs who marry Arabs in general are way way worse off than we are. Libyans are different because for some reason they are more lenient than other Arabs in how they treat their non-Arab woman, how they treat their woman in general.

Another observation I saw is that when Libyan men come to live here they are more laid back with their wives. Of course then there are the hardcore Libyans who are strict anywhere they go. I do find this to be the woman's fault though. Basically a guy does to you what you let him. Of course this is my opinion and each situation is different so we can’t really say which group gets it the easiest point blank.

I could bring a few non-Arabs, a few Arabs, and a few Americanized Arabs who are married to Libyans and ask them about their married life to see which has the best and easiest married life and it really could go either way. You can’t guarantee the non-Arab has the best and easiest marriage you know. I may be off topic but...

hussam_ze said...

lool thats a spooky one ..

i feel sorry for the guy who has to pick a wife out of this place
lool

it's all genetic , trust me .

Libyan Violet..
we are a reflection of past experiences,

Libyan Violet said...

welcome to my blog Hussam, what do you mean by genetic ?

titi said...

am agirl, & i know wat girls r cabable of doin 2 hurt a man, but com on there not easy too
of course u all know wat i mean

violet: great topic

Libyan Violet said...

Thanks Titi and welcome to my blog.