I cannot believe that it has been ten days since the descent into hell started. The conflicting news and the disrupted communication services are compounding the fears. Even the weather which has been bitterly cold, windy and rainy seems to have conspired to make the situation even more dramatic then it already is.
I'm hoping that soon we will be reflecting on this period, but right now every day is a struggle for survival and to keep our sanity.
Pearl is at the age where it is not enough to say "no honey you cannot go to school today". You can't prevent her from watching TV and catching a glimpse of things. So she wants to know why?and understand why is the city closed? and why can she not go out and play in the garden? and why we cannot visit her cousin? and why she cannot play her favorite games online, and why the mobile is not working? and why is mommy not going to work?, and why she can only have half the bar of chocolate? so many more why's.
She is almost 9 years old how can I explain to her that horrible things have happened and worse are expected? She has already asked if this was war and do they kill children?
I simply told her that there are good and evil men fighting each other and good will prevail. That's when she asked me: so when is Omar Mukhtar coming to save us?
That was the last straw and my heart there and then broke up.
I am so numb even prayers have become difficult to utter....