Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Still loving you beyond the grave

4:00 AM – mobile rings

Me : Hello ?
Him: Hello – Violet how are you ?
Me : who is this please ?
Him: I’m sorry did I wake you up ? it’s me A
Me : Hi A. how are you ? is everything OK ? why are you calling so early in the morning ?
Him : I’m sorry I got mixed up with the time difference, I’m calling you from New York..
Me : OK well you scared , so what can I do for you?
Him: Nothing Violet , I simply thought about you while walking here and wishing how much it was you with me. I will regret till the end of my life to have agreed to let you go.
Me: I’m sorry you feel this way, but you have a new life now and beautiful children and a lovely wife , you should not be calling me like this , go spend your time with her.
Him: I can’t forget you Violet, you are the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last when I go to sleep….it’s out of my hands.
Me: A. you have to work harder on it, you’ve married the woman and she trusts you and no it is not right that you should call me instead of her.
Him: She knows it is you only I love, I told her when we got married, she has me but not my heart , that is for you only.
Me: A this is unfair, you are married and have kids , you go back home to the arms of a loving wife, I go back home to an empty bed so stop doing this.
Him: Well I called because I wanted to ask you which do you prefer? I’m returning on Monday to Tripoli, and if it was for me I would buy you everything that was in the shops here in New York, I can imagine you in every outfit, so what would you like me to get you? Or shall I get you some gold trinket ? I know you love that?
Me: thank you for the thought I appreciate it but please A you don’t need to buy me anything, I’ll accept this phone call as a present..
Him: Violet, everything you ever told me turned out to be correct , I’m so sorry I misjudged you before, now I know what you were talking about, I’’ve changed …would you marry me now if I divorced her? I can keep the children?
Me: No A I did not marry you when you were unattached, I certainly won’t now that you have a family. It is fine that you learned a lesson, make use of it my friend, if you need advice I’d gladly give it but please not at 4:00 AM
Him: I’m so sorry again, I wanted to buy you a present, and here everybody and everything conjures you to my mind…

I have not seen A in 4 years and he still can’t make a decision without calling me….what do you do with a man who obsesses about you even though he knows it is a hopeless case. Everywoman wants the love which will go beyond the grave, but she wants also to be a partner in that love.


LouLou said...

I think you're a really nice & patient person. I'd never pick up. If I still loved him I'd never forgive him for being with another woman. And if I didn't love him I'd be feeling guilty about it. In both cases I couldn't stand to hear his voice.

programmer craig said...

I never even pick up when my ex calls, anymore. I just can't take it. The conversations never go well, and I always hang up feeling terrible. I'm with LouLou... you're a much kinder person than I am, Violet :)

Libyan Violet said...

Loulou and Programmer Craig, I had no way of knowing who was calling as this was an international call. Even so it was my choice he was with another woman because I dumped to guy for stalking me and being posessive, regardless of how much I loved him; his attitude was scary and unhealthy.. but you're right though my Achilles heel will probably be this 'kindness and patience' and which I think is just plain stupidity on my part :)

I like your fiery attitude Loulou, as for you Craig I know what you mean when there is nothing anymore you can say to a person then it is better not to talk to them as you end up being much frustrated.

Chris in MB said...

I think it's very inconsiderate of him to put you in such an awkward position. It's self centered.

"stalking me and being posessive,...attitude was scary and unhealthy"

Maybe I'm being a little harsh but, it does not look like he changed after all.

mahmud abudaber said...

Obviously this person is a loner with a lot of time on his hands and not knowing what to do with it. I bet you if his wife leaves him today, he will start calling her and begging her to comeback to him, just like he does with you. This type of person will never appreciate the good things in life, and as they say you will miss a precious thing when you lose it. Last but not least, this person is so out of it when he thinks he could win you back by buying you a trinket of gold.

Libyan Violet said...

Hi Mahmud sorry my late reply I had not checked this post for comments. Yes the guy was an obsessively jealous type , that's why I dropped him, and thinking of it now yeah it looks that at least towards me he has not changed because I know that he totally ignores what his wife does by the way ...well at least my loss is her gain :)

Mahmud , welcome to my blog I like it when Libyans comment as well ...helps me get things into perspective. Nothing this guy does we make me reconsider .

Anonymous said...

Hi There.

I agree with Loulou regarding you being nice & patient.This bonehead needs to learn how to put some thoughts & respect.


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